Stagnant

God, I feel so much like writing now, though I do not know where is this heading to. Time is running out so fast but surprise, surprise I am still blogging here. I am due for a damn long report that I would have to submit by next thurdsday or I am dead meat but what I have all but done, is to do my work.

In critical moments like this, I never seem to be able to work out a solution to my misery. The options are clear most of the time, its either I do it, or flunk. not that I have ever flunked before.. But you see, nor have I made a single effort to finish my work on schedule or even start on schedule.

This act of self-sabotage is not doing me any good. In fact, it is beginning to take its toll..

To give a little credit to myself, my assignments were always completed on time, though they are not representatives of my best creations. Nor were they the best in the eyes of the lecturers.

The PAIN lies in the process of its completion. Here's a typical work progress:

Duration of project: 4 weeks
1st week : laze around
2nd week : laze around (with some other fun stuff thrown in)
3rd week : laze and be in complete denial
4th week : Still in a daze, beginning to get really scared..
Last 2 days of the 4th week : Work my head off!

That ladies and gentlemen, is my typical modus operandi.

Nothing can compared to the feeling that I experience in the final 2 days of a project when all things would flash me by. And I would know there is no one that could help me but myself. And I have blew up my chance.

And today, I am blowing it up again.. at least I am in the process of doing so.

This is really scary.